I have training for Leadership Camp all day tomorrow and I will leave early Monday morning. I'm not sure why but I have been feeling really anxious about the camp. I'm hoping that training tomorrow helps ease my nerves a little.
Today, six of us went prayer walking around the city. We went right at 1 o'clock, the time that Muslims gather to worship in the mosques. It was powerful to see the faces and hear the voices of the people we were praying for. Often I just sit in my room alone and pray for the Albanian people. But it was a whole other experience to add my senses into my conversation with God. The Spirit moved today. I wish you could have been there.
I've been reading in James lately. I felt like that was what God wanted me to read ever since I got here. I keep reading it over and over. I want the Word to be written on my heart and on my mind. I was just thinking of one specific verse just now:
"But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave on the sea, blown and tossed by the wind" (1:6).
Oh how I doubt. Often I feel that trying to gain better faith is like scraping the bottom of a barrel. I've been asking myself lately why God chose me to come here and why He ever thought I could make a difference. Who I am, that I could possibly offer anything to these people? I am just as much as a sinner as they are. Oh you of little faith. I remember being told as a child that faith the size of a mustard seed could move mountains. The fan blew the pages of my Bible the other day and it landed on the passage in Hebrews that reminded me that it is impossible to please God without faith. There are not enough grains in the sand that could count how many times I have become a wave in the sea, being tossed around by the wind. When I pray, when I ask, I am told that I must believe; I cannot doubt. The truth is, I can't make a difference here. I can't. I have nothing to offer other than a few ballet dance steps and a crash course on English. Nothing that would radically change a person's life.
But, God can.
God can offer a whole lot more. He can heal these peoeple, who have faced war and loss. He can save them from sin and death. He can restore families that were once lost. He can give peace that surpassing all understanding. He can give hope to the hopeless. He can give freedom from addictions and strongholds. He can cover their lives with love that fulfills and satisfies the soul. He can bring salvation that no other source or power can give.
He can be the God of these people. He can be the Lord of this nation.
And...He can give me faith, when all mine has run out. There is no one like our God.
Prishtina
We are glad you are once again connected to the world! KC & CC
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